Twilight Jokes

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No offense to great TWILIGHT saga.
For twilight fans, see above pic :-) :-) :-) if you wish

Thanks for reading my most works

-TO day_dreamer195

Before I apologise,
Let my actions speak first.

Q: Why isn't Edward Cullen really a vampire?
A: He hangs out in trees and sparkles, he's a fairy!

Q: Why can't Edward read Bella's mind?
A: There's nothing to read.

Q: Why aren't there real vampires living right now?
A: They all killed themselves after reading Twilight!

Q: How do you know that Edward Cullen is gay?
A: Blood isn't the only thing Edward Cullen sucks!

Q: How many Twihards does it take to screw on a light bulb?
A: I don't know, they're all too busy fighting over who gets to be Mrs Cullen

Q: Why are the Cullens homosexuals?
A: Vampires burn in the sunlight, gays sparkle!

Q: What do Edward Cullen and a Christmas tree have in. Common?
A:they both sparkle.andfor decorable

Q: How do you know that Bella has some issues?
A: She is constantly trying to romantically decide between bestiality and necrophilia!

Q: Why is Twilight like soccer?
A: They run around for 2 hours, nobody scores, and its millions of fans insist you just don't understand!

Q: Why is Twilight like soccer?A: They run around for 2 hours, nobody scores, and its millions of fans insist you just don't understand!

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Q: What is the best Birthday gift for Jacob?
A: A bag of Pedigree dog food

Q: How do you scare Jacob?
A: Just yell out "Jacob its time for your flee bath"

Q: Why is Edward Cullen so pale?
A: There isn't any light in the closet

Q: How do you stop Jacob Black from annoying you?A: You pick up a stick, throw it and yell 'fetch'!

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Q: How do you stop Jacob Black from annoying you?
A: You pick up a stick, throw it and yell 'fetch'!

Q: How do you know your dating Alice Cullen?
A: Your girlfriend can predict the shuffle on your iPod.

Q: Why will Edward Cullen make an appearance in the next Narnia film?
A: Because he's that deep in the closet!

Q: Why will Edward Cullen make an appearance in the next Narnia film?A: Because he's that deep in the closet!

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